The Life And Times Of Emer Albrock

Well its been a while since my last update so I thought I would enlighten/bore those who are interested!! Last sunday I did the REace For Life with my fabulous Uni mates, we raised about 1200 pounds for Cancer Research. I thought that I would be able to complete the course under my own steam but by the end of the warm up I was fading so was really pleased that one of my wonderful friends had borrowed a wheelchair. They all took it in turns to push me, bless them. It was a great but tiring day and I cannot thank them all enough for their kindness and support throughout my ordeal. A few of them had some VERY touching things written on their backs which made me wanna cry :-)I know that their friends and families read my blog to, so a big hello to you guys too and thank you for your thought and prayers, they really mean a lot to me.

Have been to the hospital today and thank goodness my neutraphils are ok (4.5) so I can have chemo on friday. This is the penultimate one (fingers crossed) but I really dont want to have anymore. I keep reminding myself how lucky I am and at least I can HAVE chemo for goodness sake, but it just seems to get harder and harder. I think it s bit like labour, "I can't do it, I can't do it, oh I did it!!" kind of a thing. This chemo is much more potent and to be honest more down right painful that the last, although there has been no sickness so far, a positive I think. The guy who assessed me today said I should take pain killers but I worry that there are so many other chemicals in my blood!!!!!

I am still holding on to the positives, the liver tumour has not moved, the lymph node is no longer palpable and the breast tumour has shrunk from 7.5cm+ to about 3.5cm (before this lot of chemo). All I can hope for is that I continue on this path and in a years time maybe I can help other people through this experience, reassure or comfort them. All I know is that this journey has taught me a lot about myself and made me confront and deal with things that I may have been avoiding. It has also taught me the true meaning of friendship!!!

OK, thank you so much for all the kind and lovely comments I am getting, its lovely to know that you are all thinking of me. Had appointment with oncologist on friday and she said the liver has stayed the same (this is good, it hasnt grown) and is still operable :-) the lymph node she can not longer feel (was 1.5 cm last cycle) and she is very pleased with the breast tumour too :-) the other lumps she says are just normal breast tissue (forgotten what that feels like tho!!). She thinks the plan is to give me the rest of the chemo and the on with the mastectomy and THEN the liver resection BEFORE radiotheraphy!! My friend Kerry-Anne said this is probably cos they will irradiate the liver too. Onwards and upwards (fingers crossed). Docetaxel is a bit of a mare, took them 40 mins to find a vein, chemo wasnt down, forgot drugs etc BUT the had an emergency on the ward, some poor man's arterial line was completely blocked :-( blood everywhere, course I just wanted to run. I was shaking, which they were worried was a reaction but I think I just didnt wanna be there!! The drugs have made me very tired, and have a very sore throat and tongue a bit bigger than normal, have some tablets because they think stomach acid is burning throat etc (more drugs), breathing is a bit hard but all things considered, not too bad. Am really hoping to make the race for life (is there toilet breaks??) and hopefully will be there with bells on, I know you will all want a turn at pushing me xx